While the Zanuobos were having their party meeting, several floors below in the Ministry of Barbecues, a crisis developed in the buffet line which threatens international relations. Several members of a visiting delegation from the Ministry of Weights and Measures complained that they were being short changed in their portions of prime rib beef being sliced off a round at the carving table. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that the beef in question was actually a large Asian freshwater turtle doctored up with an extra layer of glaze. When technicians from the Ministry of Menu Subsitutions attempted to confiscate the turtle, an unpleasantness developed in the line among those still waiting to be served. Technicians divided the object in half to satisfy those who still wanted their portion. Members of the Ministry of Sauces and Glazes beat a hasty retreat from the lunchroom before they could be interviewed. The Chinese embassy did not return calls.

'They're Committed to destroy the Inclusive Govt'

Mugabe committed to the GNU. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha h ah ha ha ha. He's just saying this because he wants the personel snctions on him lifted so he can get at the NGO money. You're going to have to do better than that. Best for bob to get lost in Malaysia in the jungles there and stay away from our zimbabwe. Zimbabwe does not need ZanuPooF terrorists.

"Shun Vices like CORRUPTION, !! R U HAVING A LAUGH BET U HE CANT WAIT TO GET HIS HANDS ON THE DOSH AND BUILD ANOTHER PALACE FOR HIMSELF THEY SHOULD INSIST THE MONIES FROM THE GLOBAL FUND BE RETURNED

There you and your lot go again, Black souls in white skins or white souls in Black skins ,whatever, you no-do-gooders, claiming to be Librals who know more about our Revolution ,more than ourselves you think you know how we should run our affairs more than us, you want to shove your kind of Democracy down our throats ,yet yesterday you rode on our backs,today you claim to be champions of democracy , Keep it to your lot. Dziri tsitsi dzeyi kubvisa mwana webvana madziwhwa? Hezvo your Teaboy is back minus Zero, the West saw his hand in the begging bowl,not for the People and did not play ball sorry it did not work. They are now aware that RF /MDC had misled them about the sanctions and our Revolution.Honest leaders of the world are not inhumane as your lot had hoped . Remember my last writing that Teaboy,s trip was the death of the RF/ MDC. ZANU yes you have managed to cower to an extent, they are now tired , but the African Revolution will alluta continue ZAPU is well rested and ready to counter all Neo-colonialism agendas, now trying a new trick with investments, the minerals, resources and all that is in Zim belongs to us,so whoever wants to invest is most welcome, but at our terms . He is now being tasked to change the natural laws of investment ,so as to Re-colonise us again , ZAPU says No NO OH no we will never be a Colony Again. Oh by the way ,I did go back to the roof rafters for a while, to check on ZAPU cadres they sent greetings ,love and an invite to come aboard

lizard you and these few others talk about your Revolution man that was over thirty years ago so get over it and move on with life. No one wants your country but your own zanu-pf and Mugabe stealing farms and your other resources that you have. Your worry is not about the West because no one wants Zim open your eyes Mugabe over his time as President along with Zanu-pf have raped and destroyed the country.

No one in the right mind will invest into Zim because of Mugabe and the Zanu-pf because everyone including you know what Zim's true problems are. You can run all the white farmers off and steal their land and their belongings and say it is your right according to the Mugabe way of thinking but guess what go for it and do it.

Do not come to the West begging for money to rebuild your country when was destroyed by your own leaders and it will continued to be devastated until their gone..

Mr afri35 and your lot ,you are forcing my hand now, my patience with the likes of you is thinning,anyway for record,s sake , Our war of Liberation ended 31yrs ago, but The Revolution, which is ours mind you, is still an on going struggle .ZAPU is now taking over the Revolution, since the forces of colonialism have made ZANU to stumble and are tired , they are now passing the torch to ZAPU. It seems like you and the one who sent me back to the roof rafters are skirting the ZAPU issue, are you scared, no need to be ,Lizards never hurt you only gives you the creeps,feeling guilty , no need to again , just forget you once rode hard on Our backs and accept that ZAPU as the only vehicle to your total emancipation, for RF and MDC are a-dead and ZANU on its knees for now. If you decide to comment on the ZAPU issue, be smart not to bring about Tribalism , Zim Blacks are too smart to fall for that. ZAPU is an all Inclusive Revolutionary Party of the Africans, black or white, ASk Mr ZUMA

No, the West's liberals have no clue what happened during the Revolution. Most do not even know what it's like to see their own families murdered, and the few that do are deluded into thinking they will someday reap rewards for forgiving and ensslaving themselves to the murderers. The West is too good at protecting its citizens in a veil of peace, democracy, and wealth for them to understand what life was, or is, like in Zimbabwe, even for the ones working for the NGOs.

What they do understand, however, is what needs to take place to build a peaceful, democratic, and wealthy nation. If the people of Zimbabwe could just swallow their pride and hate and listen to them, they could actually build a nation as peaceful, democratic, and wealthy as any in the West... but that won't happen until the war is won against the "big men" of Zimbabwe who work to enrich themselves at the expense of their brothers.

ragtimer, I do agree with you totaly that for us to have true democracy and a vibrant economy we should swallow some part of our natural pride as a people and accomodate and accept some of Western Values, but if told to jump, should we not ask how high????? Again Sir, what baffels me is the so called Librals truely I think they are the ones spoiling the broth for us.why is it that they claim to know more about us than our,selves, these self appointed trustees of African interest boast of years of experiance in fighting for the rights of Africans .They claim the have been doing things for the blacks,on behalf of the blacks ,for the blacks,and because of the blacks. When we announce that the time has come for us to do things for ourselves, them Librals shout blue murder, like they did to Mr TD "you are being racist" I am against this white- black stratification that makes them a perpertual teacher and us a perpetual pupil, even on how we should run our democracy and freedom.They feel resentment at the growth of Black conciousness, them Librals must understand that we don,t need a go-between in this struggle for our own total emancipation .They must dedicate energy in educating their society that the history of Africa/ZIm must be re-written

Zola Mugabe is also paying lip service because he thinks he can hood-wink the international community to let him handle the money that they are donating to Zimbabwe through Mr Tsvangirai. Little does he realize that he now only fools his brainwashed Zanu-Pf idiots as the rest of the intelligent Zimbabweans have now become wise to his stupid nonsense. What a pathetic individual Mugabe has become.

Kjrs, Mugabe has always been a pathetic individual. He's just like a playground bully like richerson 88 times over.

They are committed rather to undermine the MDC in the GNU! They want to fool the people showing MDC ministers are not capable when elections come !

Criminal Mugabe has been saved from being dragged to the ICC by hinding behind the GNU. The GNU will therefore survive while limping so that tyrant Mugabe can continue to enjoy from his illegitimate presidency.

Who said he was a true patriot? Mutambara? He is just applying butter to better prepare the final assault on this rotten banana republic.

Uncle Bob, you need to adopt to the changing politics of the day and smell the new coffee. Saying something does not mean that you are committed to it and we all knwo you will never be committed to the GNU, your track record shows it. Zimbabweans are not naive anymore. Let the sanctions stay until we see some true reform on the ground. ZANU PF is out dated and out of touch with the people in every way. You played your part , which was to liberate Zimbabwe and now pass it on to MDC and the next generation who can lead the country to Economic Indepence. Everything is good in its own time. The 80s were your time and you didnt do much with them. Zimbabwe belongs to the people and not to ZANUPF thugs and thieves!. Use your last few days wisely planning your retirement and choosing exile havens!

SHEER HYPOCRISY MUGGA PLEASE DO NOT FOOL ANYONE!!!!

yeah Mugabe no one cares about your words, you are very good at saying one thing then doing the complete opposite aka liar....The Zanu-pf newspaper of course blames the West for trying to divide this unity government which everyone knows that Mugabe and the Zanu-pf are the only ones not allowing this unity government to work because they are a bunch of power hungry thief's not willing to give anyone power other than their corrupt selves...