I am tempted to laugh at the remarks made by the Mukono Assistant Resident District Commissioner, Gregory Senvuma. Senvuma.

Senvuma called upon the women of Najja sub-county to put on their patriotic armour and declare a sex embargo on those husbands who support the multiparty system. Presumably, to convert these unpatriotic men into the ruling fold.

What baffles me is that as an adult, the ARDC has not discovered the folly of females using sex as a punitive tool. Not only is it utterly unacceptable in our traditions and churches, it is tantamount to an own goal.

When a woman denies her man sex, he could take one of three courses. He could quarrel, lose his temper and for the rough ones, turn physical.

This may make the woman believe that she is pinching where it hurts.

Yet, if the truth be told, the man is only raging at the rejection of a person he feels he had access to on a 24- hour basis. It has nothing to do with sexual starvation.

Research carried out by Askmen.com shows that most married men progressively lose their libido at a point in their marriage. In Uganda, it is mostly married men who go for impotence drugs and treatment in Katwe, Owino and Kisenyi. Having sex with the same person, maybe in the same place, same position at roughly the same time soon robs the excitement and forces the man to look elsewhere or use aphrodisiacs.

It follows, therefore, that in marriage, it is the wives who would like to have sex with their husbands more often.

A sex ban therefore would ease such pressure off the men to have sex only as a matter of fulfilling their marital obligation.

The ARDC should not imagine that wives are the only people who can provide sex. In fact as a man, sex is not my problem because I can have it anytime. When a woman decides to withhold it even for a week, it will not mean that the man will be sexually starved. Never!

On the contrary, it will unlock all the padlocks a man had put in place in an effort to stay faithful. It will make it legitimate for men to cheat. Since stolen water is usually sweeter, the end result will give the man some excitement. In all this, the wife ends up being more miserable.

And, when the ban is finally lifted, what happens? The man's eyes will have opened and he will have discovered how naked he has been in the garden of Aden. It will be too late to stop him.

I imagine many mistresses and girlfriends would be happy if the married women decided to effect the punishment. They account for a big section of our society and, as a matter of course, they are active rivals of the married group. They usually act as shock absorbers whenever problems arise in the man-friend's home. Sometimes they have to keep their affairs secret and get the men only when it is convenient. I'm tempted to believe that the ARDC could have been hired by this group to lead the married gang into temptation.

The biggest handicap of such a measure is that there are so many women out there, and not enough men to go round. People who actively socialise know that it is easier to go home with a woman you have met for the first time than it was a few years ago. When you visit bars, dancing halls, and live-band joints, you discover that there are more unaccompanied women than you would care to count.

They are the independent group who buy booze for themselves. And when you join them for a dance, they take you up heartily and make you feel at home. You end up drinking a beer or two on them, exchanging phone numbers and sometimes getting an appointment for a date.

And should you make such an appointment jokingly, you will be in trouble. The telephone will continue ringing even after you have confessed that you cannot recall her name or face for that matter.

This is the scarcity we men are operating under. When your girlfriend introduces her female friend or relative, the new person starts having designs on you and overtly sends you welcome signals.

When you offer a young woman a lift, she would want to cling onto your heart. When you dance so close, she will ask you for your phone number. You invite her home, she turns up scantly and provocatively dressed - and that's if you are lucky not to get her dressed in an entirely see-through net! Telling her you are married would be the biggest joke of the month because you cannot stop water with a basket barrier!

In spite of this, a respectable commissioner wants our Movement women to push the squatting husbands into the funfair. He must have been joking.

Any presentable, social man, with an income, a car and a well furnished apartment will have not less that 10 girls wishing he would notice them.

When he gets married, those who missed out on him will seek indirect revenge on the lucky bride by sharing the man. Then there are the new ones who feel they should enlist in the ensuing competition. It is a continuous struggle in which the wife loses out because she is always the unsuspecting player. She doesn't know her rivals but they know her.

Wives often imagine they have won their men's hearts and relax.

Then an RDC comes around to handcuff them further by advising them to handle the ball in the penalty area. We all know they will concede a penalty.

In today's world, sex is increasingly becoming the most available item.

For a man who spends his day dodging women, appointments and commitments, it is incomprehensible that a sex embargo at home would bite him at all. My friend Jingo says he would even be tempted to declare support for multiparty system in order to attract such a punishment. Then he would see if his wife continued asking him why he is late.

I don't mind if Senvuma has ever faced or meted out the punishment; all I want is to advise women to treat the men as scarce commodities and if they don't want to share them, make sure they are satisfied and contented. Otherwise, your patriotic love for the Movement will cost you what the Vice President lost -- a man.