Johannesburg — IT SEEMS that the black and white skeleton in the South African closet is rattling, with recent events throwing racism back on to the front pages of both local and international newspapers. The behaviour of students at the University of the Free State should not surprise us -- just disappoint us. For where could all the apartheid mentality have gone but underground, where it has festered like a wound before emerging into the harsh light of day?

While many of us may have hoped that having the world's most progressive constitution, as well as an enlightened Bill of Rights, would have eradicated the seething tensions that existed prior to the introduction of a democratic framework, as a good friend of mine recently commented: "You cannot legislate a change in mindset."

In many ways this typifies many of the frustrations of our new SA. For we are not

an ancient nation -- bound in a common embrace -- that transitioned to become a modern state. Rather, we are a modern state that is trying to become a nation.

Political scientists often talk about nation states, but we are perhaps a state nation.

Our structure has come before our substance. We have constructed the church building before the congregation. But a church is not just a building; it is a communion of people.

Joining all South Africans together in such a way is our continuing task.

Don't get me wrong -- we have come a long way. What is sad about recent events is that what progress we have made might be forgotten.

Many people of all shades have left behind their past attitudes to embrace the present, but many people have not.

Unfortunately, these are often the people that we hear about, as negative actions invariably receive more attention than positive ones.

How do we bring these jaundiced citizens along? For although we might find their behaviour reprehensible, we cannot legislate the problem away.

Will integration happen naturally? It seems not.

But should we force it in the way the University of the Free State chose to do? Both approaches have their price.

If we wait for integration to happen naturally, we could end up waiting a long time. Indeed, many people will consistently choose to stay with people of their own culture or race, thus perpetuating the very problem we seek to solve.

Integration by choice is often a recipe for no integration whatsoever.

Forced integration on the other hand tends to heighten the tensions that exist. There is a strong push back from those who don't want to move. People go further into their shells and rebel against the change.

In the case of the University of the Free State, one solution might be to abandon race as a category in the allocation of rooms in residences, but rather to allocate people on a random basis.

At least in this case we can call it random room allocation rather than compulsory diversity targets.

One of the problems of any integration is that even though people live and work in close proximity, they remain strangers in heart and mind.

Their knowledge of one another is skin deep, and they have no desire to get to know any more about their neighbour.

This leads to what I believe cuts to the core of the problem -- people don't know one another's stories.

People across all divides need to get together to talk specifically about race and identity.

A programme that is attempting to do such a thing is the Gordon Institute of Business Science's (GIBS' s) Spirit of Youth, in which high school pupils from all backgrounds come together to share experiences and talk about issues of national importance.

Entrepreneurship, HIV/AIDS, life skills, race and identity are dissected and discussed. By entering into a structured process, where personal stories, hopes and fears are discussed, they begin to see their own misconceptions. Afrikaans and English, township and suburban, black and white. They begin to see each other as unique human beings.

Perhaps it is not introducing more rules and regulations that can help us move forward, but rather more opportunities to share our life stories with one another.

When you hear someone's personal story and understand what makes them who they are, race becomes only one of many factors in judging a person. We have to get people to see each other beyond their skin colour.

These programmes have worked at high school level and these students will enter university with a very different attitude than that they would have had otherwise.

We need to work at the level of hearts and minds rather than at the level of rules and regulations. Only then will we become a nation, rather than just a state.

Prangley is the manager of the GIBS Dialogue Circle.