She is 34 years old, robust, enthusiastic and generally passionate about life. Her name is Onnie Marry Phuthe, tall, light in complexion and if you were a single man she would definitely make an impression but would have been set to fail, as she is a married woman with strong moral values.

One of the 180 members and a board member of the Botswana Network of People Living With HIV/AIDS (BONEPWA), Phuthe is among those who have come out openly about their HIV positive status.

After introducing myself I immediately noticed a genuine smile coming from her heart. Like any journalist would do, I did not know what to expect from her but I just wanted to add her on my contacts list having heard that she was a board member of BONEPWA.

"You are a reporter right?" she asked and continued, "I need you to listen to me very carefully where I come from and how I overcame some of life's difficult circumstances that many people may fail," she started.

She went on to tell me where it all started for her. "It all started when I was growing up in my mother's household. My mother was a drunkard, abusive verbally, psychologically and physically. When I was doing Form Four, I had to leave school because I got pregnant," she said.

What astonished me were her facial expressions, I mean you could see from her eyes that indeed she had been set free.

"Immediately after my baby was born, I had to fend for the baby," she continued, "I then secured a temporary job as a housemaid and had to work all day with the baby on my back", she added.

Nevertheless, said Phuthe, her limited schooling did not stop her from finding a better and more challenging work.

"I then heard of an opening at Ellerines Furniture shop and went for the job straight away. That was in 1995 and I managed to work my way up to management level," she added. Her journey with HIV would came later in 2001 six years after she found the job.

"In 2001, I was diagnosed with HIV/AIDS and this seemed to bring back all the past sad memories from my parents home", she said. No wonder she writes in her website, "the foundation of the house I built within me collapsed, it was built on sand. The sand is the lie that formed part of my 15 years of adult life and that is my reason for sharing". She said she soon realised that changing her mindset and attitude was the only thing to set her free. "When I met my husband, I was very sick and my CD4 count was just below 200. With my determination to live positively and to make my newly found love work, I resorted to healthy eating, doing exercises and as you can see today I look perfectly healthy", she also said, "I will invite you to my house at Molepolole and you will find me busy in my garden or doing household work and others," said Phuthe.

She told the Monitor that since she was diagnosed with HIV, she is not taking anti-retroviral drugs (ARVs) as she believes in eating healthily especially fruits and vegetables as well as doing physical exercises. "The problem is that most HIV positive people don't know how to eat well and take proper care of themselves. Other food that I use is live sea salt and I laugh a lot even at myself. I believe that being HIV positive does not have to negatively affect us but we must rather be strong," said Puthe.

She was also free to share with Monitor what many may consider taboo in the Botswana society: "Since I met my husband, he is HIV negative and we enjoy a good and healthy sex life. We both know the importance of having protected sex especially with someone of my condition. Even though I resigned from my work at Ellerines, today I take care of household duties while my man goes to work everyday. If I were at work, I probably would not have time to take care of my fruit and vegetable garden," she said enthusiastically.

She also stated that it is important that people know what natural foods can do for them. "Medication is only useful in certain aspects," she said. Even though a large part of the conversation with Phuthe was in the car, I was greatly impressed by her confidence because she said all these things in the company of two other men, a driver and another in the front passenger seat while we were in the back seat.

Finally one of these men said, "I can see that you are a strong woman. You know I have a problem with my wife whom I know very well that she is cheating on me," he said to Phuthe after the interview.

Her immediate advice to the man was for him to go for the HIV/AIDS testing with his spouse and request for thorough counselling with his cheating wife.

The other man, who was driving, told us of how he divorced last year on account of infidelity by his wife.

"Now I'm afraid to love again because I know that I will be disappointed," he said.

But Phuthe told this other man that there are challenges but that people should learn from them rather than succumb to them.

Being with Phuthe was one of the greatest moments in my life since I had never met anyone who talked to me so plainly about being HIV positive, marriage and sex life.

I guess that is what also made those two other guys who gave us a lift to open up about problems in their marriages.

Even though I was born in Serowe but based in Francistown, it was the first time and probably the last that I wished the 40km journey from Serowe to Palapye could last forever. With Phuthe, mine was a life-changing encounter.