The following letter is an opinion piece on the relationship between the EU and Africa.

Dear Van Rompuy,

WHAT an exciting year 2010 has been so far. Pardon me, of course, as perhaps you would not fully share my enthusiasm and excitement seeing the stress Greece gave you. But chins up, my brother, things are indeed improving, especially for me.

SADC, as your aides probably informed you, just turned 30 and we are having a party here in Windhoek. The excitement is intoxicating. A 30th jubilee ball it would be.

It is this weekend. All the boys are coming. My eyes are misty from the sheer thought of it. We did meet last month in Kampala, Uganda, for the African Union, but we did not have fun. It was too crowded, and as you know, the dear leader from Libya was there.

Oh, by the way, I am now also the chairman of the Southern Africa Development Community (SADC). So, as you might have deduced, I am now in charge.

It is now time to push for things that are behind, especially with this free trade area concept. Can you believe that Joseph Kabila is dragging his feet on this?

Neither can I.

I would have to instill a sense of urgency to engineer Jose Edwardo dos Santos for Angola, as well.

Mind you, I do understand their arguments about recovering from the war and all, but it is just not reason enough.

Thank heavens the DRC would be giving the crown to me at the party.

No, no, we are not blaming Belgium for that. I know how touchy you get about the Belgian-Congo topic. Your Congo is still there.

I must say, the sudden renewal of interest in Belgian Congo history and Patrice Lumumba is, one imagines, an unwanted constant reminder to your fellow Belgians.

Sometimes, I just do not know what else I can do with Angola and the DRC. We agree on something and the next day foreign papers report that the two are going in the opposite direction. Just look at what happened with Inga III and Epupa hydropower dam projects.

How do you do it Van Rompuy? How do you handle those two first citizens of Europe madam Angela Merkel in Germany and Nicolas Sarkozy in France?

Reining in those two should be difficult. Their constant teasing of each other - oh, good gracious me! Sarkozy's proclivity to go kiss-feely-touchy towards ladies is another thing.

Do you know that Angela does not like it one bit? If you do not stop it, I do not know.

The other day I was very upset about the intellectual from Zimbabwe.

My world; that man's nerve! He dares say that SADC is a toothless old club of elite.

He wants us to tell comrade JZ (oh that's what we call Jacob Zuma here) must shout orders to our older brother Robert Mugabe. Yes, indeed Zuma would be here.

I must go now, Van Rompuy. Indeed the dream of a United State of Africa is still alive and SADC is spearheading it. Do not laugh; your European Union was born from a 1957 Treaty of Rome. We too will make it.

Your brother, Namibia.

Eewa