3 May 2012

Uganda: Take 5 - Emmanuel Ssebakigye - the Crackers Male Virgin


Emmanuel Ssebakigye is a member of comedy outfit The Crackers.

Polly Kamukama bumped into him in a salon in Mutungo and took five with him.

Why are you known for not keeping time?

I only turn up late on events whose organizers are not serious. For example, some journalists are very annoying; they book interviews at weird hours. Since most of the wedding parties in Kampala also never start on time, I end up arriving late.

Is it true that you have a nickname for your genitals?

Yes. I call my penis Sematimba. It's a name we (The Crackers) carved during the mayoral elections. You know that part of the body is jumpy just like Peter Sematimba. He says one thing today and another tomorrow.

So does it mean you have bedded many girls?

I have never bedded any girl because I fear to take them to my small bed. However, I doubt I will keep my virginity through this year. There are so many temptations.

Is the English accent you use on stage real?

Not really. It is all a part of the act. As you can hear, my English is not that bad. It may not be as perfect as the Britons' but at least it is impressive as per the Ugandan standards.

What colour are your undies?

I always like them blue. [Lifts his T-shirt to show me.] I like this one in particular because it is sky-blue just like the heavens. It makes me feel like I am up on the blue clouds. I feel high.

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