columnBy Philip Deetlefs
According to the ancient Mayan calendar Planet Earth will stop spinning around itself and the sun on 21 December 2012 - four days before Christmas this year. Two weeks from now!
This of course offers a wide range of wonderful opportunities.
As holiday specials many car dealers now offer new cars for sale with your first payment only due on 1 February 2013. Perfect!
Go and find the most expensive car on such an offer and go on a wonderful holiday, travelling in style. Nothing even says you have to tell your mates that you will not be paying for your new car. You're the man!
If you plan to stay at home this holiday season, remember it takes longer than 14 days for a bond over a new home to be registered.
Go out and buy your dream house knowing that you won't have to pay one single instalment on the house. Don't even bother with old furniture. Get new stuff and arrange for the first instalment of everything and anything to be paid only from 1 January 2013 onwards. Two weeks of living in utmost luxury is better than nothing!
It also doesn't take rocket science to work out that buying Christmas presents this year would be a total waste of money.
And whatever you buy, use your credit card because the merchants will not see your money. Rather spend your cash in the next two weeks on yourself, your family and friends. Every cent!
Only two weeks left to use up whatever you have and can get on credit! Don't waste any time wondering what you should do.
Keep in mind that you don't even have to bother about funerals, a testament, worry about the education of your kids, repaying debt, maintaining any of your assets, saving for your retirement or even be courteous with your boss when you leave on holiday.
If your return date is after 21 December, don't even bother with insuring your house and what is in it. Not necessary. Don't even bother closing and locking the front door.
The world is your oyster. Crack it open with gusto and swallow it down in a fortnight. Buying green avocados may even be a waste of money.
Have fun, no matter what it costs - the end is nigh.
Then, to those who happen not to believe in the Mayan calendar and its predictions, have a wonderful and happy festive season! Drive safely and come back home in one piece to a world that - according to my calendar - stands an excellent chance to keep on turning for the next 4 odd billion years (give or take a few million years) after which our closest star may burn out and the Mole in Swakopmund will freeze over. Here's to the next 4 thousand million years - cheers!