Capital FM (Nairobi)

Kenya: Six Ways to Revive Your Dying Sex Life

When a couple have been in a romantic relationship for too long or when a couple have been married for a while, sex is bound to get too routine and boring. Sexologists the world over have been researching and writing about how sex varies from new relationships, to old relationships and relationships that have been sealed in marriage for a while. You will also read in books about how your daily life affects your sex life... You wake up, go to work, come back home, cook or clean and by bedtime you are too tired for even a brief shimmy session between the sheets...

Often women will come up with excuses like: I'm too tired, I have a headache, Can we do this some other day I'm just not in the mood today, I don't feel this anymore...because they are bored and their sex life and life in general have become too routine.

People forget that sex is fundamental for a healthy relationship and not only that, a happy sex life is beneficial to your health in that it can reduce the risk of heart disease, improve your immunity and may also help keep you sane by reducing stress.

So your sex life sucks! Here are a few things you can do to revive it:

1.Join the gym or just simply...EXERCISE!

I read somewhere that the less sex you have, the lower the desire and sexual satisfaction. Being active physically and exercising helps prime your body to get in the mood for sex. When you work out, your body gets fit, you feel great as your body will function better(your blood circulation is better, your nervous system becomes more alert) and you will always have energy for some amazing romp action.

2.Take a special vacation... with your partner

You will always find that when you are in a new location for the first time you get intrigued by everything. You want to explore the venue and find out what the place holds hence you are in a new, excited mood meaning you are happier and open for more happiness. Imagine being in that place with your significant other. Exploring together and getting excited together...it's like your honeymoon all over again right? It is advised that taking a special trip with your significant other, even if it's just taking a weekend off to get away from routines of life helps to revive a couples sex life because even after getting back to normal, things will still be steamy for a bit longer...the mood will be super, and the special moments will linger on for a bit...which is what we were aiming for.

If you sex drive is dwindling at an alarming rate you can take it upon yourself to revive it by:

3.Getting regular massages

The sense of touch especially skin on skin (read being touched by bare hands) helps to stimulate the sex hormone Oxytocin. When bare hands during a massage touch you here and there, lingering in some places, you are bound to get aroused and in the mood. So, a regular massage to give you a boost in the bedroom department should be welcome in your life.

4.Reading some erotic literature

It is said that to jump start your arousal you can flip through some erotic literature. Reading gets you to imagine scenarios and play around with the visions and the characters in your head. You get to see everything the way it has been described but in a way that you want to see things. Think the Fifty Shades trilogy by E L James which explains every sex scene in detail..if you need a boost in the arousal department feel free to get your copies of the books, mark the chapters that you think will get you where you want to get and then get reading every time you want to be in the mood.

5.Finding out what could be amiss in your diet

We can lose our libido if there are some vital minerals lacking in our diet. For instance, low Folate levels will always make you feel tired leaving you with no energy to partake in sex with your partner. Low Iron levels in the body can deplete brain neurotransmitters which lead to you becoming lethargic. If your sex life is dwindling, check your diet and try finding out what could be missing in your diet that's killing your sex drive.

6.Using your sense of smell

There are some smells and scents that have been proven to help (especially the women) to get in the mood. Smells like that of a cucumber, baby powder and licorice are said to be able to increase blood flow to the 'right' place by 13% while pumpkin pie and lavender are said to do the same for a percentage of about 11%. So...get sniffing your way to that romantic mood.

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