It's hard out here for everyone. Spare a thought for instance for those who went to law school when lawyering was the hottest money-minting profession in Kenya.
It was one of the few career options in days gone by where one was guaranteed lots of money. It was a noble profession indeed. There was a however a less savoury part of the profession which was not usually seen in the public especially with the lawyers wearing their ceremonial garb.
There was a bunch of lawyers who were trying to build their name in the trade and making a bad name for themselves and the whole profession.
Many would chase after people who were in hospitals who needed legal representation and this less attractive arm of the business came to be known as 'ambulance chasing'.
They were not well regarded as many of them would get compensation for their suffering clients and would then disappear with all the loot leaving the clients for the dead.
Not the best way to do business but I am informed that enough lawyers did this, which led to a huge mistrust for the legal profession. Things have really changed for the better in recent times.
Kenya got a new constitution in 2010 and the legal fraternity has been undergoing reforms in massive proportions led by its stud-wearing Chief Justice.
There has also been increased protection of consumers and thus it has become harder for the ambulance chasers of the past to get business. They have been forced to change their ways of attracting business. There is hope though.
Lawyers in the American legal system are allowed to advertise their services like everyone else and it's something that can be considered locally.
It won't be the first time we are adopting American concepts after all. The presidential debates that were held in US just before their election excited us so much that we decided to organise debates for our own aspirants. New terms like the senator and governor are now a major part of our political process.
If lawyers are allowed to advertise, don't be surprised to see a series of adverts on TV that would put the big spenders like Safaricom, East African Breweries and Dettol owners Reckitt Benkiser to shame. Here are some of the adverts I foresee;
An actor will come on screen with an executive suit and says, "Are you in need of legal advice? Are you a house help who works for a world-famous author who is in conflict with a high ranking government official?
Did this official not only annoy your sensibilities for your preferred presidential candidate but also allegedly try to sexually assault you? Have no fear.
Simply call our toll-free number at 0 800 MATUNDA and Obingo, Onyang and Lakiyo advocates and we will tell you if you can get compensation. Call now. It's free.
Another legal company will try a different tact to get the general public to get their services; An Actress will walk into the view of the screen and say: "Are you in urgent need of legal representation?
Was the land you owned invaded by squatters and when you got a court order to evict them your bulldozer and the staff driving them were stoned by the local legislator?
Did you lose your land when it was illegally transferred to a young girl and sold to a leading Kenyan politician and you need help? Call us at Beltta, Kofia and Father Advocates on 0 800 SHANGILIA and we shall be happy to see if you require to be compensated.
Yet another legal firm looking for business would probably go with this imaginative advertisement; An actress will come on screen looking like she bought her outfit far away from a second hand stall in Toi Market.
Her braided hair won't be looking as though it was done by several women in Kenyatta Market on a Saturday afternoon. The actress will say, "Do you feel like you have been wronged?
Have you been offered a position by people who came to your house and you made agreements which they then went on to renege on?
Well our law firm Musacheka, Blind and Polo associates is your best bet. With us you are in safe hands. We shall fight all the forces of darkness or light to ensure that you are compensated. Call 0 800 CHILL.
Venue review: Wallet Time lounge, off Spine Road, Kayole
The Kenyan lounge was once upon a time a very exclusive concept with only certain parts of the city hosting most if not all of them. But more and more lounges have been established in recent times; they've even sprung up in the estates we live in.
Take Wallet Time Lounge, for instance. The pub is in Nairobi's Kayole estate and this is where I spent my last Saturday afternoon. The lounge is just behind the more famous Nyamavilla Pub and I had to walk through a dusty road in Nairobi's crazy heat to find it.
When I walked in, I found a very different environment from what I had just come from. The pub had dim lighting which was quite disturbing to the eyes considering that I had just come from the blazing heat outside. When my eyes adjusted I was pleasantly surprised.
Wallet Time lounge has two main areas; one is a lounge-type place with a little room by the entrance. This area was the darker of the two and had some very comfortable seats.
To the right, there was a well-lit area and I made my way there. My cold Tusker came at Sh140 which I appreciated as many parts of Nairobi have failed to understand why they are in business.
It is not to bleed our pockets dry instantly but to maintain us for many years. The service was very friendly and professional with Lilian, a waitress, making my day with her hilarious quips as she went about her business.
The interesting thing about the area I was in was a globe hanging from the ceiling as well as the red lighting. There was white drapery on the roof which looked better and better as time went by.
The lounge also had a TV in several areas for those who wanted to check out sport like some of us do and the FA cup was broadcasting from England with two teams battling it out.
I noted an AC Milan sticker on one of the walls and I drew a conclusion that the pub management must be a fan of the Italian football team.
The music playing at the place was rhumba and Lingala hits from decades gone by. The crowd included some gentlemen in Gor Mahia shirts who I supposd were hoping that their team beat the visiting Seychelles side in the ongoing continental football.
The patrons here were mainly guys who looked mature. The washrooms were clean enough but emergency exits were not clearly marked out. A quick recap of the venue;
Good: Decent prices and décor, clean washrooms, outstanding service, football fans can get their fix
Bad: Fire escape not clearly marked.
My verdict: It is an estate lounge where you and your boys will enjoy the old school Lingala music as you get your football fix and served by cheery waitresses.