Dillish Mathews won more than N$3 million, for being pretty on Big Brother Africa, and she has already had more people claiming to be her family and friends than Namibia's Communist Party had voters in the last election.
Namibians cling to anyone who has or comes into money like a fresh turd clings to a woolen blanket.
When it comes to money, Namibians have no shame, scruples or sense.
Tourists think we are so friendly but we all know why we grin so loudly when they are around. But let's not wash our dirty shit public, ne. Or maybe we should.
Just look at the regulars at your local tombo joint. As soon as there's a new dronkie and it appears as if he has more than N$2 in his pocket, he will be the toast of the bashu. They will laugh loudly at his jokes and be extra friendly... Until his funds run out.
Take the civil servants who cried for months over their regrading payments, not knowing how much they were to get but having already budgeted and spent that money... before they got it. When they finally received it, it was obviously not enough. Now they blame everyone from Nahas Angula to Frans Kapofi and Hage Geingob.
That's how we roll.
Remember the great tax payback debacle? We nearly had a revolt on our hands. Luckily government decided to gazette the new tax breaks and disaster was averted.
I'm still not over the fact that one Knowledge Katti, apparently, once paid N$500 000 for a plate of food at a Swapo fundraiser, at State House, that others paid N$100 000 for. By the way, it wasn't a surprise to me when the same person's company used the same venue to make an announcement on... not finding oil, recently.
As soon as we score a job we go out to open a credit account... With a clothing shop, so we can appear better off than we are.
As soon as we qualify for enough credit from a bank, or our jobs, we move out of the kassie where we grew up and move to a suburb where the rates and taxes are higher and where it's unheard of to borrow a cup of sugar over the fence.
As soon as we think we can we buy a car, that's way above our income, we wriggle out of paying a deposit because we simply don't have it.
The only thing that rivals the amount of unplanned children we have is the amount of accounts we have for things we don't need and cannot afford.
The average worker has funeral policies for days, union membership fees, garnishee orders from accounts we defaulted on, advances on our salaries, loans from a variety of companies and from a company offering debt consolidation services deducting from our salaries. A Namibian worker's payslip is a thing to behold.
We apply to one of an array of South African furniture shops to drain N$207 from us every month over a 36 month period after paying them a N$500 deposit, N$250 delivery fee and N$300 admin fee. I should probably mention that the store doesn't just take your money. They allow you to pick an easy chair of your choice ... worth N$2 999 if you buy it cash. Now do the math.
No wonder we always look out to borrow money from our colleagues and friends.
Remember the guy from Rehoboth who won N$500 000 from Coca Cola and blew it before you could say 'what the f*^k?' That opvreet spirit is alive and well in each and every one of us because we drink the same water. We must do everything in our power to murder that spirit. I mean everything!
Poor Dillish will be inundated with people who used to live next to her mother's uncle's brother-in-law, wanting to see her to borrow money to start a car wash, a shebeen, buy a taxi, bus or truck or to get that deposit for the car they can't afford. And they'll pay her back, of course.
If you want to tell me how to spend my money wisely send me an email or hook up with me on Facebook.