Kenya: Victoria Rubadiri - I Always Wanted to Fit in, But I Was Terrible At It

Citizen TV news anchor Victoria Rubadiri has shared her struggles as she tried fitting into the society when she moved abroad and later when she returned to Kenya before she got into journalism.

Victoria has recounted how, at the age of 10, she moved to the US, where fitting in proved a big challenge given her 'funny' accent and name.

"I've always wanted to fit in. I'll admit it's been a weakness of mine. I guess it stemmed from that insecure 10-year-old Kenyan girl trying to find a place in this 'New World,' called America. My 'funny accent,' and 'funny name,' would ensure my square peg would never fit in their round holes," Victoria wrote on Instagram.

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I've always wanted to fit in. I'll admit it's been a weakness of mine. I guess it stemmed from that insecure 10-year-old Kenyan girl trying to find a place in this 'New World,' called America. My 'funny accent,' and 'funny name,' would ensure my square peg would never fit in their round holes. A decade ago when I returned to Kenya, after 14 years in the US, I was met with the same dilemma this time trying to fit in to a culture that was my own but was so foreign. Again my 'funny accent,' 😜and 'funny name,' (Rubadiri is Malawian🇲🇼) made sure of that. I realised the harder I tried to fit in, the louder my difference would SCREAM. Something helped though and that was becoming a journalist right when I got back home. It turned me into a student of my Kenyan people, language and peculiarities. Every story I told was a lesson. Each year I grew in my career, I accepted my 'outsider' tag a bit more and used it to my advantage. I gained a unique perspective on the world around me and tried to articulate that through my storytelling. Not having the comfort of 'belonging' kept me hungry to learn more and strive to tell a story as it is. It is a privilege to do what I do and give my audience a view of their world through my lens. Once I accepted that I'm terrible at fitting in and better off working on myself and my craft that changed everything for me. So here's to the outsiders, the misfits, the quirky, awkward, quiet ones. Celebrate your difference, while daring to shape the world around you. #TuesdayThoughts💭 #Thankful 🙏🏽#IntrovertsSpeakToo😏 📢#AcceptandMoveOn💃🏾

A post shared by VICTORIA RUBADIRI (@victoria_rubadiri) on May 18, 2020 at 3:45pm PDT

THE OUTSIDER

After spending 14 years in the US, it was time to come back home. Here, too, she struggled to fit in. However, she realized the harder she tried to fit in the louder the difference would 'scream'.

She also mentioned that becoming a journalist helped her to understand the Kenyan culture, people, language and peculiarities. She learned to accept the 'outsider' tag a bit more and used it to her advantage.

"Something helped though and that was becoming a journalist right when I got back home. It turned me into a student of my Kenyan people, language and peculiarities. Every story I told was a lesson. Each year I grew in my career, I accepted my 'outsider' tag a bit more and used it to my advantage," she wrote.

GAINED PERSPECTIVE

"I gained a unique perspective on the world around me and tried to articulate that through my storytelling. Not having the comfort of 'belonging' kept me hungry to learn more and strive to tell a story as it is. It is a privilege to do what I do and give my audience a view of their world through my lens," she further said.

Things started to fall in to place after she accepted she was terrible at fitting in.

"Once I accepted that I'm terrible at fitting in and better off working on myself and my craft that changed everything for me," she said.

Her advice to those who feel like outsiders, "Celebrate your difference, while daring to shape the world around you."

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