Back in the '80s and early '90s, there was a popular club named Boomerang at the former Ainsworth Hotel near Museum Hill. This was the place to hang. It was by no means an upscale joint; however, everyone turned out looking very well scrubbed.
Going out was an event! It was always an eagerly anticipated affair. One would shower and dress to impress. Upon entering the club, you could sense the decorum; the security presence was noticeable only at the gate.
Local beer was the most consumed alcoholic beverage, especially by the gentlemen, while the ladies mostly drank ciders, which were easy on the pocket. The taxes were low during that time, and more Kenyans had disposable income to enjoy a cold one without breaking the bank. You felt comfortable and safe, with little pressure.
Nairobi's nightlife was alive. Hanging was fun, a culture in itself. Even after the decontrol pricing in the early '90s, maturity and respectability reigned. Everyone felt comfortable. Clearly, maturity is not a factor of age; it's an attitude.
But over the years, the nightlife or rather the going-out scene, has undoubtedly changed for the worse. It's even worse for a lady of repute, as there's always someone trying to forcefully talk to you or grab you. It's quite hectic. Men make no effort to look neat or dress up. Meanwhile, they are basically in clubs to prey on young ladies who don't mind as long as they are making money.
And we call this 'a night of clubbing?' Good Lord!
We no longer have the likes of Visions, Beat House, Annabels, Bubbles, and even the old Carnivore ('Carni'), which was a different proposition at the Simba Ngoma, where people kept it classy.
These days, it's a different generation. Times have changed, and club owners aren't keen on prioritizing the overall experience at their establishments. Their main focus is to fill the place up, drive alcohol sales, and gain traction on social media by promoting ratchetness. They flood Instagram feeds with pictures of skimpily dressed ladies to portray a vibrant atmosphere. I challenge you to visit most of their IG pages and see for yourself what I am talking about. Meanwhile, patrons are left unsatisfied.
One could argue that we are facing a dying culture, where social norms have shifted and there is a barrage of clubs just a stone's throw away, all offering nothing substantive. Therefore, it's become a boring geography. Back then, we chose to go to Boomerang instead of Bubbles because that was the experience we wanted. On another occasion, we chose to go to Carnivore on soul night because that was what we wanted.
I believe it's important to address certain issues, especially considering that someone might be listening or reading and taking note. Over the years, I've noticed several factors that have led many revelers to prefer staying at home. Allow me to highlight a few of these observations.
Counterfeit Alcohol
Many bars and nightclubs are selling counterfeit alcohol, posing risks to revelers' health. A couple of weeks ago, on a morning TV breakfast show, Eric Githua, Chair of the Alcoholic Beverages Association of Kenya (ABAK), said that a staggering 59% of liquor in circulation is illicit. 'We conducted industry research last year in collaboration with the government and realized that 59 percent of the alcohol sold in Kenya is illicit; that's six out of every ten bottles,' he said.
Well, not so shocking! We know this and seem to either accept it or have become accustomed to it.
Last month, I visited a certain establishment in Nairobi's Kilimani area. It was 5 p.m., just in time for cocktail hour. I asked the bartender to mix up something nice; something that would make me want to return. I took only two glasses of cocktails.
Within an hour, I began feeling dizzy and overly-intoxicated. Something felt off, so I quickly called my cab driver to come pick me up. Even walking to the car was a challenge, so I asked a bouncer to assist me. Thankfully, I made it home, but what followed was terrifying. I spent the entire night vomiting, despite only consuming two cocktails. I had a pounding headache that went on for hours. I kept wondering if I had been served counterfeit alcohol.
Considering these risks, would you still want to go out clubbing?
Poorly Dressed Patrons
One gets into the club and alas, there are scantily dressed patrons and those who don't bother to clean up before coming to the club. I could safely say we are the worst dressed club patrons in the region. It's either no effort or just bad outfits.
Sadly, club owners have also settled on having female DJs and 'hostesses' dressing up skimpily to attract randy male revelers to purchase premium drinks and to drive fruit fall. This is absolutely low class nonsense!
In the Nairobi clubbing scene, it's unfortunately not uncommon to encounter patrons who neglect basic hygiene. It's not always just about affordability of drinks; people just don't seem to care about themselves and the people around them. Recently, a certain establishment was trending on social media due to complaints about its unpleasant environment. Such situations are unacceptable. Infact a frequent female patron shared her experience on Twitter, expressing dismay at the apparent lack of showering or cologne use among men at the establishment, resulting in noticeable body odor.
Is it that our men are not conscious about personal hygiene, or what seems to be the problem? Personal hygiene is non-negotiable. It's concerning to see a disregard for such basic standards. One might wonder about the dating preferences of individuals who neglect personal hygiene. Clubbing culture should involve proper hygiene, grooming, and dressing appropriately for the club. Men, sandals are not club wear.
Shouldn't people prioritize enjoying themselves in the company of clean, well-behaved individuals when going out?
Also, what's even worse is that most of these clubs in Nairobi have poor ventilation.
Anti-social Behavior
I believe social media culture has fundamentally altered the clubbing experience. Why bother going out if you're just going to spend most of your time glued to your phone screens. It is such an annoying behavior to be seated with people who are constantly checking out what's happening on social media, thus neglecting the present moment and failing to engage in conversation.
Clubbing should be a social and inclusive experience, where we interact, network, have a good time and jam with the people around us in the moment.
Let's put down our phones and truly connect, creating memorable experiences that go beyond the digital realm.
Ratchetness
Ratchet behavior has become the new norm in the club scene. A good number of ladies are not only dressing in almost nothing but also lacking decency. Recently, I walked into a spot along Ngong road and was quite shocked. Women were twerking everywhere, in skimpy outfits that nearly exposed their knickers. I could barely stay for more than 30 minutes as I felt uncomfortable and embarrassed.
In addition, ladies can no longer just go out and have fun without some men making unwanted sexual advances. These uncouth men don't understand the concept of consent. They grab girls' behinds or, even worse, try to forcefully start a conversation. This has led to women feeling unsafe, resulting in fewer refined ladies going out.
Pricing
Have you ever noticed the stark contrast in pricing between clubs located in different areas of the city or town? Take a bottle of your favorite drink, for example. You might find it priced at a premium in upscale neighborhoods like Westlands or Kilimani, while the same bottle could be significantly cheaper in areas along Kiambu Road or Thika Superhighway.
This discrepancy in pricing based on location is not only baffling but also unfair to patrons. Why should the cost of a drink vary depending on which part of town you're in? Is there any logical explanation for this practice? Imagine partying in Westlands, where a bottle of a certain whiskey sets you back a hefty Sh12,000 whereas the same bottle is priced at a fraction of the cost, just Sh4,500 on Kiambu road. It's simply unacceptable.
Club owners need to address this disparity and provide transparency regarding their pricing strategies. Charging exorbitant prices in affluent neighborhoods while offering the same products at significantly lower rates elsewhere raises serious questions about fairness and integrity.
Who wants to go clubbing anymore when you're constantly ripped off based on where you go to party?
Discrimination and Lack of Inclusivity
Every time I talk to young ladies who no longer enjoy clubbing in Kenya, they cite this exact reason: they feel profiled and discriminated against. These are mostly women in their 20s who just want to go out and have a good time. They say that when they walk into a club, they already feel judged by the waiters, who deem them broke and seeking male attention.
Consequently, waiters are slow to serve them, look down upon them, and sometimes, ignore them. These women have to literally demand and shout for service attention at the club. They no longer feel included, and who can blame them for not wanting to go out clubbing anymore when there is no inclusivity?
Theft by Staff and Waiters
Do you feel the constant need to double-check your bill before paying? It's become a necessary precaution because some staff members, especially bartenders, have been known to collude to inflate prices, assuming you're too inebriated to notice or dispute the charges. The staff also take advantage of drink offers to steal from patrons by charging the original price instead of the offer price. It's a deceitful practice that leaves patrons feeling cheated and disillusioned.
I know it's a tough economy for all of us, but come on, theft is unacceptable.
Some staff even outright steal from you. I vividly recall an incident when my friends and I visited a popular spot in Westlands. As we were preparing to leave, one of my friends noticed that their phone was missing. Panic and shock set in as we frantically searched for it. We demanded to review the CCTV footage, and the manager assured us that we could do so the next morning.
The following day, as we reviewed the footage, our worst fears were confirmed. Right there on the screen, we saw the staff member who had been serving us drinks casually pocketing the phone, assuming we were too intoxicated to notice. It was so disappointing.
Is the constant risk of theft worth the night out?
Special Treatment for Certain People
I find it rather amusing when club owners seem so devoted to pleasing Nigerian 'wayo' boys while ignoring the locals. What's that all about? These club owners have this assumption these wayos' have a lot of money and are willing to splash it on the most expensive whiskies and champagnes, which is often not the case.
You've probably seen these boys walk into a club, causing waiters to scramble to usher them into VIP seating areas, with staff on standby to serve them. Meanwhile, the local patrons receive second-class service and are often simply ignored.
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Well, to club owners, you do realize these wayos' are not there to spend, but to mostly leech off men and women who throw themselves at them.
Repetitive Playlists and DJs Who Talk Too Much
Another concern is the repetitive playlists and incessant chatter of DJs. Many share this sentiment, questioning the purpose of venturing out to the club when the experience feels all too familiar. It's quite underwhelming, as this leaves little room for excitement or spontaneity. With exposure and access to an extensive catalogue of music, one would think DJs would seize the opportunity to offer a diverse and captivating mix.
However, it seems like DJs have become complacent, opting to stick with the tried-and-tested formula instead of pushing the boundaries of creativity. You all know the all too familiar Afro beat playlists in most clubs.
In addition, there is the issue of DJs who just can't seem to stop talking (we all know them by name). It's rather annoying to club-goers who yearn for the music to take center stage. This drives me crazy, and I remember one time I just couldn't take it anymore and literally walked out of a club and went home. The DJ was yapping too much. Ugh! Why subject oneself to the monotony of the club scene where they play the same old tunes and add relentless DJ commentary?
As dissatisfaction grows, more patrons are opting for alternative forms of entertainment or simply staying home altogether.
Meanwhile, businesses reliant on the nocturnal economy are facing unprecedented challenges. Club owners don't realize that this is one of the key reasons why most clubs in Kenya have a short shelf life. They are the ones killing clubbing themselves. The once-thriving pulse of the nightlife scene now beats irregularly, echoing the uncertainty that pervades the industry.
The Transactional Hookup Culture
Clubs are no longer just sociable entertainment spots; they've now also become places for transactional hookups. Some women are going out to clubs with the intention of getting men to buy them drinks, whereas men are going out with the intention of picking up girls by paying for their 'services.'
Certain clubs are notorious for this kind of behavior and somewhat support it. For example, it's not uncommon to find pretty young ladies hanging out at a spot, probably sipping on cocktails and sharing shisha, waiting for men to approach them. When approached, they give you their rate cards, iykyk.
It's almost impossible for many gentlemen to strike up a conversation with a female patron without it being transactional. What happened to making friends or socializing at the club? Does it have to end with you spending money on someone to socialize? Is it 'soft prostitution'?
Unless these issues are addressed, the nightlife scene will continue to struggle, pushing patrons to seek more fulfilling alternatives.
