Emotions are like fire. Once you get caught up in them, there's no way out. There's no option but to burn. And people who are caught in fire do not think logically. They do not worry about ethics. They do not worry about what people think. The only thing that worries them is the way out of the fire, and they will do anything to find it. Who can blame them, after all?
Emotions are like fire--particularly negative emotions. When gripped by anger, people stop using logic. Emotions become the sole driving force of their actions, a force without a gear to control it. Logic and ethics fly out of the mind, and sometimes the person consumed by emotion may not even realize what has come out of their mouths. They do not give themselves enough time to digest the information that made them emotional and reflect on it. The decision to act becomes immediate, without any careful thought.
Some people say that you should note what comes out of a person's mouth when they are angry at you, as they have been dying to say it for a long time. Anger is like drunkenness. When people are drunk, they tend to have the courage to say things they would never dare to say otherwise. Drunk people do not filter what they say or do. Whatever their minds tell them to say or do, they will do it.
Personally, I believe the most important way to respond to someone in a strong state of negative emotion is with absolute calm. But it takes a high level of wisdom and self-control to do that, of course. It is one of those things that is easier said than done. But whether we like it or not, responding negatively to a person in a high state of negative emotion will only result in a higher state of collective emotion--like putting fuel on fire!
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Negative emotions make us do or say things we strongly end up regretting afterward. Some people might openly reflect their regret, and some may want to hide it out of shame. But the feeling of regret will be there, hidden or not. So one of the things that I would like to practice, and which I wish everyone practiced, is the art of remaining calm when confronted with another person's negative emotions.
- Advertisement -The art of remaining immune to another's negative emotions! The art of letting it pass without fighting it. It takes a lot of courage and wisdom to keep calm in the face of adversity--but it should be done. In fact, because we cannot control the other person's emotions, the only thing we can do right there is to control ours. I also want to practice the art of self-control--of not being carried away by negative emotions without careful thought about the situation.
We have found ourselves saying, "If only I had taken a deep breath, not let my emotions get the better of me, given it one or two more days before saying or doing anything about what angered me!," countless times.
Time is a healer. I have come to an age where I have realized that things that made us react emotionally matter less and less as time passes. Even waiting to act for a couple more hours, or even a minutes after the emotion-triggering event, makes a difference in the way we respond to that event. With time, the negative emotion that overwhelmed us does subside--but only if we give it time to subside. Time is a healer.
