Renowned human rights activist and scholar Jimmy Spire Ssentongo has slammed the traditional practice of bride price, arguing that its modern form has strayed far from its original cultural purpose.
Speaking candidly about his own family, Dr Spire said he refuses to participate in discussions over the monetary or material demands of his daughter's marriage.
"I can never sit in a meeting to discuss items or money to be given to me for my daughter. That would be an insult to my daughter, and a display of greed on my part," he posted on X, formerly Twitter, drawing rave debate about the subject.
"My daughter is not like a cow that I'm breeding for the market, for me to earn from her marriage. All I would wish for is a sensible man who would treat her right, and that they love each other. The introduction ceremony should basically be about the two families meeting and getting to know each other."
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Historically, bride price in Africa was not intended as a transactional sale of a girl child. Across the continent, it was a symbolic token of appreciation from the groom to the bride's family and a demonstration of his ability to provide for a household.
Contributions of livestock, money, or goods served as proof that the groom could care for his wife and future children, fostering respect between the families and ensuring stability within the marriage.
However, modern bride price practices have often been distorted.
"Many young people in these hard times are no longer able to marry because of these retrogressive practices that hardly ever get questioned," Dr Ssentongo, a lecturer at Makerere University and acclaimed editorial cartoonist, observed.
"Today, Kukyala [when the groom is introduced to the bride's family] has become a huge show-off function. Kwanjula [exchange of bride wealth] is like a concert. Then a bigger religious wedding follows!"
The transformation of these ceremonies from meaningful rituals into extravagant displays has created immense social and financial pressure.
Families now compete to showcase wealth, while young couples may find themselves unable to meet these expectations, leaving many unable to marry.
Spire emphasises that these changes are not inherent to culture but are distortions driven by status and social expectations.
"Culture can be improved as times change. Otherwise, things that were once meaningful can evolve into a nuisance protected under the banner of culture," he said.
For Spire, the introduction ceremony should remain a space for families to meet, build relationships, and celebrate the union, rather than an opportunity to negotiate material gain.
"It should not be about money or material gain. That is the real insult to culture," he added.
In many cultures, cohabitation is frowned upon and a man's family must show commitment with at least a Kwanjula - giveaway ceremony - before he is allowed to start a family with his lover.
This has led to many young many "grassing" in an increasingly tougher economic market. Those who have lived in Rwanda and parts of Western Uganda will confess to the challenges young men go through to get to start a family.
Others commenting on the post pointed out that while bride price historically served as an indicator that the groom was prepared for marital responsibilities, today the practice has often lost that focus.
"Bride price was never about selling the girl child," said Boaz Arinaite Katuramu. "There is no amount of money that can buy a human being. It was about respect, appreciation, and ensuring the man has enough resources to support his wife. But now, it has become a source of stress and exclusion."
Spire's views resonate with a growing number of Ugandans who question the sustainability and relevance of contemporary bride price ceremonies.
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While some consider it a cultural anchor, others see the financial and social burdens as counterproductive, leaving many young people unable to marry or delaying their plans for family life.
Spire advocates for reforms that reclaim the original intent of bride price, focusing on unity, respect, and preparation for family life. Marriage, he insists, should be about love and partnership rather than display or transaction.
"All I wish for is a sensible partner for my daughter and families who meet with respect, not to haggle over items or money," he said.
As Uganda continues to modernise, Dr Spire's reflections challenge communities to rethink how culture interacts with contemporary life.
By restoring the essence of Kwanjula as a celebration of relationships rather than material gain, families can ensure marriage remains meaningful, equitable, and accessible for the next generation.
