Speaking exclusively with PREMIUM TIMES on Thursday, Igbevia Florence, a successful cattle merchant in Delta State, spoke about her unique love story with the Isoko Highlife musician and why she wouldn't be joined in matrimony as her three co-wives on the same day.
On Wednesday, social media buzzed with the unprecedented news of Arube Otor, popularly known as Isoko Fela One, a renowned Delta State-based highlife musician, stirring up a storm with his extraordinary plan to wed three women on the same day.
The much-discussed wedding of the Isoko Highlife singer, set for 19 January 2025, will take place at the Anglican Church Field at London Base, Uzere Kingdom, Isoko South Local Government Area of Delta State, a location steeped in cultural significance.
PREMIUM TIMES reported that Mr Otor would marry three to-be wives, Oghenekome, Ewoma, and Oghenekaro, on the said date.
Meanwhile, the would-be fifth wife, Igbevia Florence, a titled chief in Delta State, opted for a different date and venue. If and when the marital rites are concluded later in the month, Mr Erube would have five wives as he already has one wife of over two decades.
Speaking exclusively with PREMIUM TIMES on Thursday, Igbevia Florence, a successful cattle merchant in Delta State, spoke about her unique love story with the Isoko Highlife musician and why she wouldn't be joined in matrimony as her three co-wives on the same day.
Excerpts:
PT: Why are you opting for a different wedding date, and why did you accept to be Mr Erube's fifth wife?
Florence: I am a titled chief, so I can't be joined in a wedding with the other three women, so mine will be held later. I have been married before, but my husband died. What I like may not be what you want, and we all have reasons for marrying a particular person; I didn't accept his proposal because of money.
I know that he has many women flocking around him, and I didn't accept to marry him because I am lonely or because I don't have men who make advances at me. Sometimes, you may marry a wealthy man, and you won't have peace of mind, or you may marry a man who even has many wives, and you will always be at war.
Mr Erube is not like that; he is principled, and his senior wife is also like that. When I have physical or financial problems, he stands behind me as a man. When I am angry, he can tell by looking at my face, and he will go to lengths to make me happy. There are no issues when I visit his family's house, and we don't fight. This peaceful coexistence is what makes our marriage work.
PT: How did he woo you?
Florence: I have known him for almost four years. I live in Oleh, and he lives in Ozoro. We met in Ozoro. He approached me and told me upfront that he had a wife and would like to marry me. He came to my house. I invited the other three wives to my place and told them their husband's plans. I checked them out, too, and I will be the fifth wife.
PT: What is your relationship with your co-wives?
Florence: All the wives love each other, and I love my co-wives; we can pass for sisters.
PT: Wouldn't you prefer to be the only wife, or you don't mind sharing your husband with four other women?
Florence: No, I don't mind. As a woman, you are fine once you are busy or have a source of income. I have been a cow dealer for over 20 years.
As long as I don't have other women or people coming to my house to fight me or disturb me over him, then I'm ok. I avoid such scenarios.
PT: Will you all live in the same home after marriage?
Florence: I have my house in Oleh; one of the wives lives at Ellu, while the other three wives live in the same compound as him. The senior wife also lives in the same compound as our husband.
PT: How do you manage gossip and side remarks about your intending marriage?
Florence: You can't take a tablet for someone else's headache, and I don't want any woman to come and disturb me at my house. Some may say that I cast a spell on him because I am selling cows and that he is marrying me because I have money. When he proposed, I told him to bring his wives to see me in my home, and I asked them if they agreed. None of them has ever hurt me, nor have I hurt them. We cook together, shop together, and dress alike. If you attend our wedding, you will understand what I'm saying. All of us will dress alike.
PT: Since you already have children, do you plan to have more children for him?
Florence: I am 55 years old. No, there is no room for that one. I don't have children for him. I am a mother of five graduates.
PT: What are your children's relationship with your husband-to-be?
Florence: They are cordial and don't have any problems. For the wedding, we bought outfits for all of them so all our children would dress alike.
PT: Some may think you agreed to marry Mr Erube because he is a celebrity.
Florence: I don't have anything with a celebrity, so to hell with a celebrity. I'm not with him because he is famous. I already told you why I'm marrying him. I found peace in him, which has nothing to do with his celebrity status.
PT: Many wonder how polygamist share their time and take turns with their husband (sex-wise).
Florence: I've already told you I do not have that time. I am after my peace. I am a traditional religion worshipper, and you know we have rules. If he likes, he comes to my home, and if he doesn't, as long as I am at peace, I can't even follow a single man or rich man because of societal issues. My children are all graduates; I don't have time to fight over a man.
PT: Did you ever think you would marry a polygamist
Florence: Never.
Sign up for free AllAfrica Newsletters
Get the latest in African news delivered straight to your inbox
PT: So, when did you realise you loved Mr Erube?
Florence: When I am with him, I have peace, and when I want to do anything, he will stand behind me physically and financially. None of his wives have ever been to my house in our almost four years of courtship to hurt me. No Christian man will come and marry a traditional worshiper like me, but he has.
PT: Any advice for women intending to marry a polygamist?
Florence: Suppose it's your choice and what you like, go ahead. In some polygamist homes, when you have peace of mind, that is all that matters. Some are married to one husband and are in bondage, while some polygamist homes are not in bondage. For me, if polygamy gives you rest of mind, you can join it.
PT: Do you like his music?
Florence: I love it 100 per cent, and it is the talent God gave him. He can drive or sleep, and God will inspire him, and he will pick up his phone and record it. His songs have meaning, and I love that.
PT: It appears you are richer.
Florence: People say I have more money than him, and that's why he loves me. Here is a man with four cars and musical instruments worth over N10 million, and I have just one car, so how does that translate to me being richer when I have one car? He doesn't believe in collecting my money because he believes in self-preservation as a man. He doesn't collect my money; even when he is stuck, and I offer him money, he will reject it.
